Member of the Family: My Story of Charles Manson, Life Inside his Cult, and the Darkness that Ended the Sixties is available now from HarperCollins

“Dianne Lake met Charles Manson in 1967, when she was just 14. She didn’t participate in the horrific murders carried out by Manson and his followers in August 1969, but she was the youngest member of the Manson Family. And at 17, she was a key witness at the trial that resulted in his conviction, a death sentence that was commuted to life in prison, where he remains.”

Rolling Stone – Manson Family Memoir: 10 Things We Learned. In ‘Member of the Family,’ Dianne Lake – who was only 14 when she met Charles Manson – reveals new details of life in the infamous cult …

“The Manson girls used bulimia as a form of control -When the Family ended up in jail, the girls were not used to being fed three meals a day. Nancy Pitman and Lynette “Squeaky” Fromme were concerned that the women would gain weight and therefore no longer be attractive to Manson. “We all made a pact that we would throw up our food instead of being forced by our jailers to gain weight,” Lake writes. :Nancy made it a regular habit and showed us all how to stick our fingers down our throats to rid ourselves of food. After a while, it became like a rush and a way to control the situation. I knew I would continue the habit even after I was released.” Lake started eating regularly again during her time in the psychiatric hospital. She had met someone with anorexia and felt guilty that she was throwing up her food on purpose when her fellow patient had no control over this.”

This is my least favorite life
The one where you fly and I don’t
A kiss holds a million deceits
And a lifetime goes up in smoke
This is my least favorite you
Who floats far above earth and stone
The nights that I twist on the rack
Is the time that I feel most at home

We’re wandering in the shade
And the rustle of fallen leaves
A bird on the edge of a blade
Lost now forever, my love, in a sweet memory

The station pulls away from the train
The blue pulls away from the sky
The whisper of two broken wings
Maybe they’re yours, maybe they’re mine
This is my least favorite life
The one where I am out of my mind
The one where you are just out of reach
The one where I stay and you fly

deep dark web:

““The layers of the Internet go far beyond the surface content that many can easily access in their daily searches. The other content is that of the Deep Web, content that has not been indexed by traditional search engines such as Google. The furthest corners of the Deep Web, segments known as the Dark Web, contain content that has been intentionally concealed. The Dark Web may be used for legitimate purposes as well as to conceal criminal or otherwise malicious activities. It is the exploitation of the Dark Web for illegal practices that has garnered the interest of officials and policymakers. Individuals can access the Dark Web by using special software such as Tor… Tor relies upon a network of volunteer computers to route users’ web traffic through a series of other users’ computers such that the traffic cannot be traced to the original user… Once on the Dark Web, users often navigate it through directories such as the “Hidden Wiki,” which organizes sites by category, similar to Wikipedia. Individuals can also search the Dark Web with search engines, which may be broad, searching across the Deep Web, or more specific, searching for contraband like illicit drugs, guns, or counterfeit money. While on the Dark Web, individuals may communicate through means such as secure email, web chats, or personal messaging hosted on Tor…”